Thursday, December 17, 2009

What should I do about my three year old not having a male figure in his life?

My three year old is starving for attention from a male role model. He has been acting out at school lately and giving me a difficult time. I am feeling like a bad mom for not doing enough for him. I am out of ideas. He is to the point at6 school where he is getting very mean to other students at school where they think he might not make it there. My son does hve problems but he is not a bad kid. He just needs something that I cant help him with. Pleae what should I do? I need suggestions.What should I do about my three year old not having a male figure in his life?
I would reach out to any other males in your family, brothers, uncles, grandfathers, etc. have them spend some extra time with him. There's also the Big Brother program...that may help.What should I do about my three year old not having a male figure in his life?
Contact the Big Brother Association.
But that's the thing! It IS something you can help him with! Do you have a brother, an uncle, a grandpa, or a friend that can spend time with him? I wouldn't suggest going to a Big Brother's Assoc. because you don't know who's out there and I wouldn't trust my son with someone I didn't know, but there's always family and friends who I'm sure would love to help you out with that. You can also try looking for a relationship. You never know. Mr. Right may be right around the corner. Good Luck!
Sign him up for Big Brother Big Sister. And maybe he's acting as a result of some other underlying problem. Maybe he should see a therapist.
Big Brothers/Big Sisters is a wonderful organization for children such as yours. My husband is a big brother and loves his child that he sees. They just do all of the fun things and have those guy talks that he doesn't get from his mom. Might be worth a try.
3 years old and already acting out in school wow. I feel for u cuz I'm not even sure whether he is old enough for the Big Brothers program but u might want to start there then the Boys' and Girls' Clubs of America but I think they start at 6 yrs. of age. Where's his dad? R u freindly with him? Do u have any brothers or male cousins near by that may help u or ur dad? Seek out family members who would help u first then reach out to daycares or other local agencies. Oh yeah and how about hiring a male teenage baby sitter to help even when u r home or while u r running errands. Good luck.
it is never your fault as to why there isnt a fatehr in you and your childs life. you cant force someone to be a dad. but you can always go to someone in your family because no matter what they are always there for you. my bestest friend was having the same problem and i told her you know what i will be your child father. if he wants to got to basketball games and what not im here. just ask your father or brother or cousin maybe even your uncle. and when all else fails show up at your baby's father family house and let them know the trouble your having wiuth the absence of your sons dad.
My son didnt have a positive male role model until he was about 6 years old. Just give him lots of your love and attention. Also you could try a ';big brother'; or find someone in your family who would be good for him. My son latched onto every dad that came to school, but he knew that they belonged to someone else and that he was loved by me and all the other females he was surrounded with. Concentrate also on the fighting and and meanness, it might not have anything to do with a male role model, maybe he has other isssues that aren't being addressed.
I'm going through the same thing, I'll take him out to sproting events we watch it on television, also I try to hang with others who have boys, its hard but teach him to be a respectable young boy he will have tantrums, even if a male was around...





Don't call him bad(if a child hears that they will believe they are bad)





Speak allot of time with him





Let him know hands are not for hitting





Punishment, put him in time-out a minute per age(3 minutes since he is 3)





Good luck


everything will be fine
I agree he needs a positive male role model. Try Big Brothers, or possibly a Adult Male member of your family or even a play group at your Church. I know it's tough kiddo as I am both a parent and a Minister and my 3 year old is bad about throwing fits and while I am in her life, so is her momma and I work with many parents who go on being single parents and I can relate as I once was with my son about 15 years ago. I know where your coming from. Keep up your chin, God Bless and Merry Christmas.
Some kids are a little High Spirited even with a good male %26amp; female role model. Don't be too hard on yourself %26amp; give it time! Just keep spending as much quality time with him as you can! {hug}
If you have a brother or uncle or someone close to you that is a male friend then you should let them spend some time with him. Let them take him to the park to play ball or play some video games with. You are not a bad mother. It is the father that is a bad father for not being with their child unless they have a good reason (i.e. death). You are a great mother.
No grandpas or uncles?





Sounds like you need to enlist the help of a child psychologist. Don't let this get away from you.
Try Big Brothers they might be able to help you. Barring that try any male family member who will be good and stable with him.
As one fo the others said do you have any other males in your life that could be that role model i think the best persont aht you could ask for would be YOUR dad or maybe a brother....... I had to contenplate all of this when i had my first baby and was a single mum...... Take care and persevere... Talk to the school guidence councellor or social worker some schools run big brother and sister programs that might help as well





HOPE that helps you
How do you know for sure he is doing that because he doesn't have a male figure in his life? I have a 2yr old daughter, and I know that is different from you but she doesn't know what a dad is either. I do my best as a mother and you are going to have to face the fact that you have to be the mom and dad in your son's life. He could be acting out because of other things and maybe he just likes attention. I hope everything works out for you, and the main thing I can suggest is to pray about it.

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